Mental health Journey - Page 2
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Old 24-11-2014, 06:51 AM   #21
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Re: Mental health Journey

Sure, I guess my main personal lament is that it has taken a lot longer to recover than I'd anticipated. Certainly others have it worse, in my case it was hard to function for quite awhile. I've been gung ho about recovering but it's just taken forever. Years in fact. Starting to get up to other stuff now though rather than be partially incapacitated, anyway. I had no idea what to expect really, and was apparently too optimistic, so there's that too.

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Jaded (24-11-2014)
Old 24-11-2014, 04:54 PM   #22
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Re: Mental health Journey

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Sure, I guess my main personal lament is that it has taken a lot longer to recover than I'd anticipated.
Don't let that discourage you dude.

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Certainly others have it worse, in my case it was hard to function for quite awhile. I've been gung ho about recovering but it's just taken forever. Years in fact.
I take it from the way you talk, your illness has become apparent only recently (last five or ten years). You sound like you have a lot of insight and you certainly possess the intelligence to manage your illness. Just take it as encouragement that you are able to get up every day and get out of bed. And if you can walk out of a door, or talk to someone or anything "normal" be proud of those achievements.

Every day will get better until they start getting worse again. And vice versa.
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cirric (01-12-2014)
Old 24-11-2014, 05:29 PM   #23
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Re: Mental health Journey

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Psychosis guilt can be well beyond intoxication guilt. But ... to put things in perspective it took being quite a lot more messed up than just being drunk/high to say or do hurtful and insensitive or oblivious things. In my case, anyway.

Feeling rotten plus being sick can be paralytic.

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I get similar, i have BPD and major depressive disorder and the guilt that you can't function normally just makes it so much worse. You end up in a loop of feeling guilty for being guilty that you've spent the last month nesting in the bedroom.
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Old 24-11-2014, 05:33 PM   #24
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Re: Mental health Journey

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You end up in a loop of feeling guilty for being guilty that you've spent the last month nesting in the bedroom.
That's where volunteering comes in.
No-one can get on your case for giving up your own time for others (unless it's detrimental to your well being).

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Old 24-11-2014, 06:10 PM   #25
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Re: Mental health Journey

Yes, volunteering can help, but not if your refusing the leave the house and can barely leave the bedroom. Any kind of obligation hanging over you just makes you feel more guilty for not being able to fulfil that obligation. which in turn makes you feel guilty for feeling guilty, because you know mental illnesses are illnesses and you're not well, which then feeds back into whatever mental state triggered the whole thing in the first place.
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Old 24-11-2014, 06:26 PM   #26
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Re: Mental health Journey

Sure, I guess I'm just talking about mild depression rather than full-blown mental illness?

Again, there's a lot to be said for taking your own initiative, noticing and changing bad habits and then reaping the satisfaction of achievement, however minor, which you then build on and make into a healthy feedback loop.

Equally, I'm not surprised that people who aren't mentally ill have a hard time dealing with or imagining what it's like if you are, in the same way that most people don't give much thought to what it's like to be confined to a wheelchair or deaf or whatever.

What I will say (which I don't see many people mention) is how weird it is from an outside pov that people with lower-level mental issues can often easily identify their own symptoms and poor/irrational behaviour quite clearly and yet are often somehow incapable of making even the smallest of contributions to making themselves better again.

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Old 24-11-2014, 06:50 PM   #27
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Re: Mental health Journey

The stigma around mental illness can make it hard to acknowledge, I was living with borderline and major depressive disorder for years until I was finally diagnosed, and up to that point I would pass it off as just me being me. Even now, with an understanding of things that will trigger me, it can be very hard to open up about it to people.

And sometimes the triggers are nothing you can anticipate, my mood and my emotional state can switch, i can't control it. I can't even anticipate it most of the time. I can't speak for anyone else, but certainly attempting to modify my behaviour only goes so far. I'd really like for this to stop but it stretches back as far as I can remember, there is no 'better', just greater understanding and acceptance of it. So I try really hard not to kill myself when things are bad, and just to get on with things when things are good.
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Old 24-11-2014, 09:50 PM   #28
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Re: Mental health Journey

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It sucks that you feel you have to add this disclaimer, after the experience you described with your father.

I guess most people don't understand the difference between behavioural issues and mental illness. I had a friend go on a diatribe about how anti-psychotic drugs are all bullshit and just used by psychiatrists to test experimental drugs on people. I invited her to go to my girlfriends work and hang out with the 6'7" axe murderer next time he was unwell and then see if she still thought the drugs weren't necessary...

Hopefully things will change.
Yeah, well that's why I ultimately put the disclaimer there; not because I don't think there is such a thing as mental illness or that there are not cases where intervention, be it pharmacological or otherwise, is necessary. I do, however, from my own experience and the experiences of others in my life, believe that people (read: unqualified people in positions of authority) often throw labels and diagnoses about without the qualifications to do so and that these casual brands carry with them life long impacts, even if they are completely baseless and inaccurate which, I feel from my similarly unqualified position, is too often the case, axe murderers aside.
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Old 25-11-2014, 04:46 AM   #29
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Re: Mental health Journey

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Equally, I'm not surprised that people who aren't mentally ill have a hard time dealing with or imagining what it's like if you are, in the same way that most people don't give much thought to what it's like to be confined to a wheelchair or deaf or whatever.
I cannot disagree strongly enough with this. People show consideration to those with disabilities in just about every aspect of life. Shit, they get their own parking spaces! Think about it, you see a man with a cane walking on the street and then become acutely aware of them and are mindful of their needs.

Contrast this to when you see a homeless person talking to a rubbish bin. Of course, this is assuming that your one of the few people who actually notice homeless people (most don't). You may not be so bold as to cross the road, but you will definitely avoid them. And even if you don't. If you stand on the street in their vicinity for long enough, you'll hear exactly what society thinks of homeless people - who are by and large mentally ill.

If your kids were with you, you'd tell them not to go near the homeless person. But you're happy for them to walk right up to a blind person and ask them questions. This is because all mentally ill people are rapists and murderers and eat babies. Contrast this to the reality where mentally ill people are far more likely to harm themselves than anyone else.

It's very easy to put yourself in a blind person's shoes, just put on a blindfold. Same with deafness, wear some ear muffs. What can you put on your head to simulate the idea that you are destined to save the world from Space Jesus' evil twin?

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What I will say (which I don't see many people mention) is how weird it is from an outside pov that people with lower-level mental issues can often easily identify their own symptoms and poor/irrational behaviour quite clearly and yet are often somehow incapable of making even the smallest of contributions to making themselves better again.
Well I don't think anyone's saying that because it's not really that weird is it? I understand the root of this question is in ignorance. Think of it like this: If you saw someone with a broken leg in a cast, would you question why they are so incapable of walking? Would you question why a cancer patient doesn't just get out of bed and go outside for some fresh air? I don't think that you would, because we all know how broken limbs and illnesses like cancer affect people.

When you see someone who has insight into their mental illness, you are seeing someone who is making a HUGE CONTRIBUTION to their recovery. The fact that they are unwell is not their fault and, like a broken leg or cancer, there is nothing they can do about it except seek treatment.

And the thing is dude, just about everybody experiences some form of mental illness. At some point in your life, you will be mentally ill. And the reality is that wherever you are, at least half of the people around you have experienced their own mental illness.

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The stigma around mental illness can make it hard to acknowledge, I was living with borderline and major depressive disorder for years until I was finally diagnosed, and up to that point I would pass it off as just me being me. Even now, with an understanding of things that will trigger me, it can be very hard to open up about it to people.
This. Most people struggle with mental illness on their own for years before getting to Kaede's point where they can get treatment and learn how to manage their illness. Some people, like my father, struggle with it their whole lives. But he'll never do anything about it, because we are conditioned to suck it up, carry on, deal with it. The idea that our minds may not be functioning correctly is terrifying because we innately understand that if people knew they would run a mile...

Even unwell people look at other unwell people through the same lens as "normal" people view them!

Ultimately, we need to get to a point where mental illness is no different to any other illness or injury. When you get a cut, you put a band-aid on it. If it keeps bleeding you go and get stitches. If you have a cold, you go to a doctor and get a prescription. If your head's not right you go to a mental health professional. But sadly, for most people, ending up in a psych ward is the first opportunity in their life that they have to do that.
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Old 25-11-2014, 01:50 PM   #30
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Re: Mental health Journey

You assume way too much about me man when you know fuck all.

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Old 25-11-2014, 02:06 PM   #31
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Re: Mental health Journey

I assume nothing about you. In fact, it was your assumptions that I took issue with. Anyway, I really don't see what I said that's stuck a nerve with you.

Read it again. I'm generalising.
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Old 25-11-2014, 04:11 PM   #32
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Re: Mental health Journey

A course of antidepressants and a year of psychotherapy helped me come to terms with my depression. There is no cure as such I don't think, I still get depressed but it's how I handle being depressed that has changed.

I used to lock myself in the house, dump my girlfriend, quit my job and drink myself stupid every few months. The result being a lot of pissed off chefs and ex girlfriends, one of whom is the mother of my child.

Becoming a father helped me focus on what is more important but not until I was actually doing the psychotherapy.

Many people swear by meditation, I started doing it this week, it's very calming, helping with my anxiety. I also started swimming for exercise every week and taking the kids for walks so I make sure we get fresh air and a little sunshine. The wife likes the sunbeds, I tried that but burnt my dick.

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